


you keep the showers away

by liesmith



Category: Cow Chop
Genre: Commission fic, Goodbyes, M/M, rubbing off in a rv in below freezing weather, sad boys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-15
Updated: 2018-05-15
Packaged: 2019-05-07 05:50:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14664600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/liesmith/pseuds/liesmith
Summary: what's he going to do now?oraleks watched this happen. maybe he should've stopped it.





	you keep the showers away

Things were a long time coming. Piece by piece, bit by bit, Aleks watched every single bit slot into place as Trevor got more petty, more bitchy, more tired, more depressed. No matter how good of a fuck Aleks totally knew he was, his dick couldn’t magically cure everything. He couldn’t blame Trevor, though, since, yeah, not everyone was cut out for the shit they’ve gone through, and as long as Trevor’s been with them… you know, Aleks really can’t give the brunet any shit for it and hightailing back home. Aleks just wishes it wasn’t _now_ , that’s all. They find some stable ground, finally, between the both of them, and Trevor… goes.

Aleks doesn’t want to blame himself, but, you know. That’s just how brains work.

Trevor breaks it to him, as if Aleks hasn’t known all this time, over dinner at Aleks’ place. Mishka’s at their feet, asleep, and Aleks thinks the moment is… a bit surreal. He can’t even remember having his old relationships over and doing this kind of domestic shit, but here he is with his definite coworker, maybe boyfriend, and they are just. Eating dinner.

“I gave Brett my two weeks,” Trevor’s eyes are lowered, not making contact.

“Oh,” Aleks says, though he tries to act like it’s not killing him, “oh.”

“I’m going back home,” Trevor pushes around the cheap Chinese food rice, not making eye contact still, “I’m just unhappy out here, you know?”

Unhappy with me? Aleks wants to ask, but he knows this isn’t about him. They’ve all taken the move to Cali pretty hard; Aleks is the only one that is happy to be out here, besides Brett, but Brett doesn’t god damn count. “Yeah, I know.”

“I’m sorry.”

Aleks swallows, taken aback by that. Why would Trevor apologize for trying to be happy? “H-Hey, uh, you know… it’s ok. We’ve been getting a lot more interns, so like… we’ll be okay.”

“I meant about us.”

Us. Was there an us? Aleks just glances down at his plate. “... I can visit, right?”

“Yeah, dude,” Trevor gives him a small thumbs up.

He goes home that night. Aleks spends the night mad at himself. He knew this was coming, and yet.

And, yet.

Brett pulls him aside at work the next day. The Grand Canyon, the RV trip, it’s all Trevor’s idea. A big send off. Aleks is completely on board and momentarily forgets that at the end of it all, Trevor will be home. Brett, despite also loving the plan, spends a week stressed renting an RV and the shittiest one that appears he gets, maybe to spite them for springing this on him. But, it arrives, and they all pile on for a good, good bit, which is just a fucking disaster filming. Aleks can’t even imagine what it’s like edited for viewer consumption. He was _in_ it and hated it.

It gets to a breaking point very, very soon. If, at the very least, Aleks didn’t stop bouncing off the fucking walls, Brett was really going to run them off the road and hope he went through the windshield and then abandon them in the cold with a dead RV. It wasn’t Aleks’ _fault_ he was so… cabin fever-y. There’s only so much you can do in a moving confined space and he’s trying to distract himself from the inevitable.

Finding the hotel fucking helps, at least. A change of scenery, somewhere that had a working heater and more then one bed and nobody was that miserable with the choice. The RV would have to be dealt with in the morning, but that was Brett’s job, that Aleks would be reamed for, but whatever. Aleks could just sleep through it and do what he was going to do best. Be sad about what would come the next day.

The idiots get their own room, and he and Brett share, like usual. It’s bumfuck am, and they’re all so exhausted, but Aleks is wired, jittery from nerves and Redbull. Once they settle in, Brett’s out like a fucking light, and Aleks the idiot just sits on his bed, still dressed, staring at his phone in his hands. It’s flashing low battery at him and he should really plug it in, what if something happens to the babies? Family? But he can’t compel himself to move to find his charger, especially when he can’t stop thinking about how In a couple of hours, everyone will be awake, and then they’ll be at the Grand Canyon, and then.

And, then.

Aleks grips his phone a little tighter, scrubbing a hand through his hair. He digs in his bag and pulls out a not destroyed cigarette pack, slips out of the room quietly, and finds himself outside. Still fucking cold. He left Colorado because of this bullshit and here he is, yet again, staring down at semi-white snow. Aleks just burrows into his jacket after lighting a cigarette, shoulders scrunched up and he just kind of stands there, in the fucking cold, puffing away. He probably just looks absolutely stupid, but at this point, Aleks doesn’t care too much.

He does, however, jump a mile when Trevor comes out of nowhere. How is someone so big so quiet? Like a goddamn mouse or something. He’s wrapped in the Minecraft blanket in a makeshift jacket and just stands there, shoulders slumped. Aleks thinks that Trevor looks sad, but he might just be projecting. Aleks is sad, so it’s pretty unfair if nobody else is sad. That’s just how it works, right?

“... I heard you get up.”

“Yeah,” Aleks offers instead, flicking away ash and looking over at Trevor, “aren’t you tired?”

“Drained,” Trevor’s voice is soft and Aleks’ chest aches. He just takes another drag and flicks it into the snow, taking a step to the side and letting their shoulders touch. Trevor’s quiet as he lifts the blanket, pulling Aleks up under it.

“... I already miss you,” Aleks decides to go first because if he doesn’t, Trevor definitely won’t say anything, “you really suck at this relationship thing.”

“Sorry,” Trevor offers, shoulders giving a small roll, “things working out like this, I… didn’t expect it. I guess it’s pretty dingdong of me to assume.”

Who the fuck says dingdong? “Yeah, asshole. Now I gotta go home and cry into my dog’s fur and eat tubs of ice cream.”

“You already do that,” Trevor doesn’t miss a beat, looking down at Aleks, “you cry at everything. And you eat everything”

“Dude, fuck off. I can’t help it if tv makes me feel emotions. And stop jabbing at my baby fat. I can’t get rid of that, man. It’s baby fat,” Aleks grunts, shoving at his side, which just makes Trevor whine and curl away, dragging the blanket with him.

They stand there for another moment, Trevor finally scooting back to let the blanket cover Aleks, and the blond sighs.

“What are we going to do, Trev?”

“Discord has video calls, I think.”

“And then what?”

“You’re rich and I said you could visit. Get a plane ticket every once in awhile,” Trevor shoots him a glare and Aleks just ends up sheepish, a small smile on his face. He’s not wrong, but he certainly can’t be buying plane tickets every two weeks because he gets lonely, and… Aleks, he gets lonely pretty often.

Silence falls again before Aleks just takes Trevor’s hand and Trevor, fucking sweet dumb Trevor laces their fingers together and his hand is so warm and familiar and, fuck. Why now? But Aleks, he tries to be so good, starts to lead him towards the RV. There is some privacy in there, despite the lack of heat, and he knows Brett left it unlocked because who the fuck is going to steal a broken shithole covered in Redbull and chips? and, well, Brett probably wouldn’t care if someone did steal that broken shithole. Less of a headache for him. Trevor follows, almost obediently, and Aleks absolutely hates _that_. How is he supposed to start getting over Trevor at this rate? Sweet, dumb, absolutely perfect Trevor. God dammit.

He steps into the dark, freezing RV, and swears. Shit. He really wished this thing wasn’t a piece of shit now but he musters on and leads Trevor down to the back bedroom, kicking things out of the way. Fucking… monsters, making a mess of this place. Who the fuck did that to rental property? Aleks stands to the side of the bed, finally letting go of Trevor’s hand and misses it immediately, but Aleks kicks his shoes off and slides onto the mattress, shivering. The thing almost feels like plastic it’s so cold, and Trevor gets the memo. He kicks his shoes somewhere into the dark of the hallway and the bed sags with his weight. Aleks is on his back and Trevor is on his stomach, just looking up at him through those ridiculously long lashes, and why the fuck is Aleks noticing all these things now? Who does that?

“... Trevor,” He starts, as if it’ll help him finish any sort of thought he has, “Trevor, I don’t know what I’m going to do.”

“Don’t think about it,” Trevor offers, propping himself up on his elbows as he closes the distance between them, kissing Aleks soft, “please.”

The plea is enough for Aleks to give up, give in, and just let go. A hand settles in the thick of Trevor’s hair, fingertips just touching his nape as they kiss again, and Aleks hopes everything he wants to say he can show. He kisses with need, a soft whine in his throat as Trevor’s mouth yields under his. They break, briefly, and Trevor readjusts himself to scoot up and they kiss again. Quick ones in a row until Aleks can’t take it and pulls back, hands starting to fumble at Trevor’s sweatshirt, pulling and tugging in any attempt to get something. He’s not thinking that clear and when warm hands grab his, he stops and stares at Trevor, who just looks exasperated.

“You’re supposed to be older. Why do you always act like you’re gonna blow it in your jeans?”

“Fuck off,” Aleks laughs, genuine and sweet, “you have a good way of making me hate you in seconds.”

“My talent,” Trevor winks, slow and goofy, and Aleks shoves his face, grinning himself, “just bare with me for tonight, alright?”

Bare with him. Sure. Aleks squishes Trevor’s cheeks as they kiss, again, and then he pulls away as Trevor sits up and moves to cover Aleks’ body with his own. Hands go where they want and Aleks, you know, being Aleks, his go to Trevor’s sweats immediately, fumbling as he gets his hands inside. Trevor’s own have pushed up past his sweater and jacket and are just palming at his stomach, sides, any bit of skin he can get at. Aleks feels only slightly bad for immediately going for the dick, but really, it’s his last night with it. He could stand to be a bit greedy, after all. Trevor doesn’t seem to mind, anyways, with the way he’s at a chub right now. It always sends Aleks’ ego into overdrive when the barest of touch starts to get Trevor harder and the brunet’s own mind kicks into gear.

Trevor’s hands slide from his tummy to inside his own pants and Aleks just thanks fucking God they’re both wearing easy to get off clothes or else he’d just… he’s not sure, really, but he’d be pissed. Hands grip and push and somehow by muscle memory, dicks are out and Aleks pushes his hips up and Trevor’s go down, and, fuck. Fuck.

Trevor has the better grip, palm up against Aleks’ shaft, fingers curled around them. Normally Aleks would complain about lack of something, but he’s too far gone and needy to care, jerking his hips up into Trevor’s touch, the steady weight of Trevor’s dick against his, and fuck god damn shit. His brain short circuits and Trevor’s panting against his ear and Aleks feels like he has a fever, body burning as he turns his head, kissing at any part of Trevor he can get.

Neither of them last long. Aleks arches and his body shakes, whining out something that sounds like Trevor’s name, and Trevor makes the softest of sounds against his ear, a tiny _Aleks_ that just goes to the blond’s gut. Motherfuck.

He doesn’t even mind that Trevor’s full body weight fits on him. In a way, it’s just a nice relief; a warm, heavy, steady relief. Aleks wraps his arms around Trevor, hugging him tight as his face burrows into the crook of his neck and… they just lay there, two bros with their dicks out, and he’s just so tired he almost misses it. Trevor’s mouth is still near his ear, and quiet as a fucking mouse, he hears an _i love you_ and.

And.

“... Trevvy,” Aleks croaks, wonders where the fuck his voice went. Clears his throat and starts again, eyes drooping, “Trevvy, m’love you too.”

 

* * *

 

What Aleks remembers next is Asher finding them tangled up in limbs and blankets and telling them to stop dicking around and get ready, the tow guy’s coming in twenty. Both Trevor and Aleks make a weird walk of shame back to the hotel and then.

They’re on the road again. Battery won’t die on them this time when they stop, tow guy promises. Aleks is just sat on the couch, leaning against Trevor as he looks out the window, watching the road roll by. Trevor’s not focused on him but there is a soft hand at his waist, hidden by Aleks’ body, and that’s… you know, that’s weirdly enough for him. He doesn’t know how the rest of the trip will go and he doesn’t want to think about it, but Aleks is comfortable here and now.

Whatever tomorrow brings, the future brings… he has Trevor, and that’s enough.

**Author's Note:**

> this was a commission! which if anyone is interested in, i am taking. info is at boydamsel.tumblr.com but i also just take requests also


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